I get a buzz from being cold and wet

OK, this is really friggin' pitiful.

Due to being overly annoyingly squishy and cooing lately, the Yak is gonna be quiet for a bit. You see, I need to figure out what is going on in my life and I don't want to jinx anything good that might be happening. I'll probably have an update in a week or so.

Remember: if you want something or someone, ask.

Lust for life

So, who can name all the songs I have been quoting as my titles for these spews?

I spent a good portion of my evening chatting with a friend in Texas tonight. I've known him since 1996. Decent fellow. Australian. Anyway, he is also a musician. Inspired by some discussions we had earlier this summer, he wrote a song for me. I just listened to it tonight and was bawling my eyes out. Amazing how some folks seem to see through you. Anyway, I put it on one of my mixes. Excellent song.

OK, I'm cutting this short. I just wanted to put that out there.

Sunrise over the turquoise mountains

Well, I bit the bullet and decided to suffer the possible teasing and torment resulting from asking a friend who may have a way of contacting one of the fellows from my vacation because I was really missing him something awful.

What happened sort of shocked me; no teasing or tormenting. He responded that he would look for an email address for the lad. He also told his sweetie (after verifying my tale with her) that I supposedly found someone decent...finally. Too bad he lives two states away. Now, I'm waiting for the axe to fall and for the torment of torture and teasing to occur when I am in their area for their wedding.

I guess it is just the all important lesson learned at Pennsic coming back--If you want something, you have to ask.

I told Shaun of my surprise at the reaction of support and seeming approval I received. He sounded like I shouldn't be and that my friends will always look out for me. I know they do, but there are times, such as when I find someone in whom I may have a romantic interest, that I expect ridicule ;)

Of course, with my history, I deserve it.

Welcome to your life...

I'm back from two weeks of having way too much fun and being way too evil. Now, for 340 days of feeling mildly wracked with guilt and being reminded of how lonely my life really is after having spent two weeks sharing laughter, amusement, and my bed with someone special. Yeah, someone who lives way too far away to think of persuing a real relationship with, but who left enough of an impact on my life to make me miss him dearly.

What's worse is that it was not one, but two men. One was recently met and the other was one I had known for many years but who spoke to me those words I had only dreamt of hearing him utter: "We're divorced now..." He was quite happy when I observed that he was single now, as was I. We kept each other company quite nicely. But, I doubt we will again and it was just one of those things.

My attitude about myself was raised quite high over these two weeks and now, it is quite low as a result of returning home to, well, nobody.

Oh well.

Sowing the seeds of love

OK, the regular Friday giggle-fest has passed here at work and, in an effort to avoid such catty emails, though entertaining, in the future, I decided to post a message that may be of use.

Advice for men who post to dating web sites:
1) A working knowledge of English is a must.
Women usually are turned on by men who seem intelligent. This sparks the primal part of our brains that says "This is a good provider. Must mate with him." Reading a message filled with failed net-speak, also known as "Lazy-ass mo-fo" speak is an instant turn-off because it screams "WILL NOT PROVIDE! NOT INTELLIGENT!" at us.

2) Post a photo.
Yeah, I know, that sparks the ideas of the viewer being superficial, blah blah blah. But hey, aren't you also? It is evenly spread around across genders. If you aren't posting a photo, that sparks the thought of "This guy is not to be trusted."

3) If you do post a photo, post one of yourself.
Again, if it is so obviously not you, such as one found as a filler photo of a frame just purchased, it screams "Do not trust this man!!"

4) If you do post a photo of yourself, do not post one of you with your arm around some woman.
Yes, we can see things at the edge of the photo. It may be your sister, or the bridesmaid you were paired-up with at your cousin's wedding. However, to the casual viewer, it does not seem that way. It may be your ex-girlfriend or even your mom. The tips of a fly-away hair-cut or the strap of a dress make us wonder if you are already involved with someone or even married. One of my friends received an email from a man who had posted a photo of himself in a tuxedo in which the sleeve of what was obviously a white wedding-dress and the edge of dark hair was visible. Her first thought was that he was probably married, or he was lying about having never been married. She then sent the profile information to all of her female friends for their input and to share a laugh. Needless to say, she didn't respond to him. It could have been an innocent photo, maybe he was in the wedding-party. However, she didn't know that. So, play it safe and leave any possible questions out.

6) Posting photos of yourself topless is just plain desparate.
They usually, in my circle of female friends, bring the phrase "Oh honey, come out of the closet already!"

7) Photos of pets are good.
Pet ownership shows that you have the ability to care for another living creature. This again sparks the primal mating desire of your average woman.

8) Punctuate. Period.
The same friend forwarded a message to me she received from an interested party. I had to spend 15 minutes editing it to make my headache go away so I could sort of understand what he was intending to say. There were no commas, periods or apostrophes. This is not including spelling and grammar mistakes. The apostrophe thing is a huge issue. Please consult Bob the Angry Flower for more information at Bob's Quick Guide to the Apostrophe, You Idiots.

Anyway, I hope that that helps improve the success of folks on any dating web sites. Above all else, be honest. If you feel you can't do that, there is no way you will be comfortable enough in a relationship with anyone you might possibly meet on a dating web site. And, if all you want is a one-night stand, well, if you're not comfortable with yourself, the sex will completely suck. Trust me. I know what I speak of.

Also, if this advice is followed, perhaps I can get through a Friday afternoon without nearly wetting myself with laughter at what friends of mine on dating sites feel the need to forward on to me.

Have a good two weeks. I will be without web access on vacation.

Live well, be well, fight well.

Empty shells belong upon an empty shore

Well, the boxes have been re-packed. Tomorrow, I leave work by noon to come home and load the truck, then off to purchase some last-minute items. Then, sleep. Friday, work until noon (too many meetings I can't miss), then home to sleep and then pack the final items and then hit the road for an all-night drive. Woo hooo.

Tired. Vacation panic has hit full-force. By Sunday, all should be good though. By then, I'll be chilling in my pavillion, away from electronic items, reading, sleeping, and just being. The hassle will be actually getting there, negotiations for land, and then setting up. Actually, setting up should be alright. I'm tense about the new spoke poles for the pavillion, but if they work, all will be good. Some folks I never met before were overly kind and offered to help me with putting up my pavillion. We seem to have formed a pavillion set-up party, wandering to each other's encampments to set each other up. It's a nice way to meet new friends, if you ask me.

OK, time to hit the hay. Gotta get some sleep banked for the all night drive on Friday.

Night!

It's too late by the grave...

The work day is almost over. It's time for a blog moment. Perhaps I am a bit more chipper in the daytime. That does defeat the purpose of this blog stated way back when as my place to vent and spew and keep a portion of my friends away from that side of me and allow another portion of my friends to see that side of me.

Which portion is closer or dearer to me is up to individuals in each group to decide--not necessarily for me to.

One of my coworkers is turning 50 tomorrow. He is going through a horrid introspective time at the moment. I can't really say that I blame him at all. In the past twelve months, both his older brother and his father have passed away. He left the office quite upset a few minutes ago, caught in a torrent of wishing he had a better relationship with both his brother and his father and knowing he can't really do much about it now. He has a twin brother who is, well, a leech. He is willingly unemployed (on disability, but is perfectly able to do construction projects for cash under-the-table) and is constantly calling my coworker for money. My coworker is just vulnerable enough at the moment that I fear in his desire to have a relationship with his twin that he feels he missed with the rest of his family, he will let himself be used terribly.

I now have the Garnet Rogers song from which I pulled my title for this entry in my head. I was asking for it, I suppose.

OK, time to go home and then work out then home again to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. That has been very lacking these past few days. My non-spouse came over for a bit last night and we talked until late for the worn-out puppy I was feeling like last night.

Yeah, home. I swear it.

In the past, I've changed my mind, but...

...this has got to be the last time!

Yeah, Cheesey Overplayed Hits of the 70's strikes back, eh?

So, what is it about Montana? Flying over that state to Washington last week and then back again caused me to totally burst into tears. For some reason, I also found myself deciding that I am not very content with my life. My feeling of "freedom" resulting from having no real ties to where I am has changed into a feeling of being very temporary. I feel like a balloon with a string that dangles and may get mildly tangled on a branch or in brambles, but I eventually will work myself free and start drifting again. It is probably part of the feeling of being disconnected I felt a couple weeks ago. Montana was probably just calling to me. You know, somewhere remote and away from people...
...and close to Canada. *laugh*

Yeah, my coworkers were moderately amused by my wistful looks at the green interstate signs declaring "5 North Vancouver" and by my collection of brochures on ferries to Victoria and other parts of British Columbia. However, both of them are happily married and didn't like my idea of going to Canada to find some Canadian guys to spend time with. Oh well.

Been packing a lot for vacation and looking forward to that greatly. Two weeks away from the city-from any city- will be a nice change. The benefit of hitting people with sticks and throwing weapons is just icing on the cake, eh?

Anyway, life continues on its slogging pace. I don't like that. I must find something to derail my life as is. Because, as is is a disconnected, impermanent, drifting, monotonous slog. That isn't good.