I must be what I must be and face tomorrow...

Not much happening tonight, so this may be an even more boring or cerebral post than usual...or else it will be really short. Sorry about the length of that last rant. When I read it in the morning, all wondering about why I was so tired was put to an end.

Blindmeow-meow, thanks for the comment. I know you wanted to say something more, so I would say go ahead...that is why there is a comment area, right? Besides, we're all anonymous here, and that is where a certain freedom does come in.

I'm not going to toss Lainey aside. I also understand why she may be acting the way she is. And yeah, it's high time I get over that subtle jealousy and just remember that hey, I'm me and nobody else can be that. I chatted with my mother, who has known Lainey as long as I have, about the whole situation and she did put it in decent perspective for me. The main thing is that Lainey and I have very different perspectives on life and, when we were younger, those differences were less apparent since neither of us had really lived a life yet. As we grew older, those differences became more pronounced. When Lainey and I moved to different regions of the country, those differences became even MORE pronounced. Those things are differences...not one of us being better than the other, just things that make us us. I just need to remember that more often.

And, I need to remember people like Joe and Thomas and their opinions that Lainey was just irritating to them, just as I know I am to others. It all balances out in the end.

"So I'll continue to continue
To pretend my life will never end
and flowers never bend
with the rainfall"- P. Simon

night.